Dear friend, even though your question is quite complex, the answer is very simple: ask your husband, and/or the pastor's wife in charge of you.
A woman of God has a very important role in the church, she definitely should be present and beside her husband in everything. However in each place, and in each situation, everything may vary and I can't really say what you can or cannot do. That's why the best thing to do when you are in this situation is to ask your husband and the wife in charge. They will be the best people to tell you what is appropriate for you to do.
What is important is that you don't become afraid of asking. Obviously there are things that you don't even need to ask, such as counselling the women in your church... unless you were told not to do so...
But in regards to other activities, ask... The worst that can happen is that you might receive a no, but that's all :) And God is in control of everything and He knows what's best for His work. Don't be anxious, allow Him to use you the He wants to!
Kisses to all!